So long you crazy diamond....

You know Mitch Hedberg? No? Well now it's too late. Mitch died of a heroin overdose, thus depriving the world of one of the greatest comedians ever. He was totally under the radar because his schtick wouldn't translate well into a sitcom (neither did Jeff Foxworthy's, but the problem with him was not being funny to begin with). Wikiquote has some great Mitch stuff, Here are some of my favourites.

I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. Hell yeah, reminds me of summer time, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on, better flip that Frito, dad, you know how I like mine.

I saw a six pack of soda-pop for $1.20. That price fucks with your head, man. Because then I thought that I would start selling soda-pop. Suddenly I got things of pop with me. "What's going on, Mitch." "Not much, looking to buy some pop? Fifty cents a can. It's not refrigerated because this is a half assed commitment."

I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut...I don't need a receipt for the doughnut - I'll just give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario in which I would need to prove that I bought a doughnut...Some skeptical friend, "Don’t even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here...oh wait it's back home in the file...under "D", for doughnut."


RIP Mitch




More Mitch quotes

posted by Thomas @ 13:44